Late to the Party and Strange Writing Habits

On NPR last week, I was amused to hear that people were eating oranges in the shower. Yes, I listen to NPR, I listen to conservative talk radio, I listen to progressive talk radio, I listen to my ever growing Audible library, I listen.

I was even more amused to find that people were having a great time eating oranges in the shower and that it “changed some lives”.

This all started on Reddit a year ago, some mystical place on these interwebs where I have not yet dipped my big toe.

Well, I ate the orange in the shower. As an author and poet, I am always interested in trying new things, even if they seem silly. I am happy to report that it was fun. I did use a Halo. Are these real oranges? Was I cheating? Unsure, but I did smell the orange more and did receive a tingling, goose-bump feeling as I chewed the funny fruit with the hot water pouring down.

It was kind of cool to throw the peel and not care, but I certainly had to clean it up after or my dear wife would have said something. The kids wanted to try it too, and it became a family affair.

I must confess that I only sort of like oranges. I eat, or drink, a lot of fruits and vegetables, but the orange? It’s just alright and not my favorite all the time. Blueberries pack a punch for writing energy when the coffee well has gone dry. This did not spark in me any kind of life-changing event that would help my writing, but it was worth a go. Now that I am a teacher, I do like my red wine in the shower on Friday evening though.

When writing for the Letters Book, I often imagined the person I was writing to was in the room, or behind some secret curtain.

What about you? Are there any strange routines that help you with your writing? I joked around in a previous post about using gasoline and live animals to pump the primer, among other crazy notions, but do you have any weird writing habits?

 

A Visit with Poet and Letter Writer Brandon Lawrence

Here is a spotlight  on one of our letter writers behind the recent book Letters Never Meant to be Read.
letters
Brandon Lawrence is a young poet, musician, songwriter, nerd, lover of all things nerd, and a hobbyist. He loves to delve into new interests as any curious human being. Brandon lives in the deep dark of Pennsylvania. We all need someone, or at the very least, something of someone to relate to. Brandon takes that approach to heart and hopes to achieve that goal with you through his letters and poetry. Below you will find a bit of magic in a poem or three.
A Knight in Shining Tinfoil Armor
Ride in from the horizon, sun glimmering off of him.
Looking chivalrous as ever, as rich a king.
Until he came closer to view, and the light had grown dim.
The horse was not a horse at all, and he had not a shield, nor a sword, or ring.
Instead he had a dog, one of great mange.
Tied to his fingerless gauntlet, bound to him by chain.
On him a thin metal, not armor, but silver and strange.
Not made of mail nor plate, full of rips yet no scratches no dings, had not one blood stain.
A man, from a far, seeming capable of the greatest feats.
Not wearing a helm, but a strange resemblance, a sort of metal hat.
Yet from personal space, not owning a pair of boots for his feet.
Looking much like a knight, but one of great shame at that.
He was a man of great respect, kindness and thanks, never asking for more.
A knight of the Templar he was not, but instead a knight in shining tinfoil.
I Am
I am the man in the shade, the man of shadow.
The monster you fear worst, devourer of souls.
Lacking of heart, of breath, no longer hanging.
Having a hunger, endless void, far from shallow.
I am, that which haunts you, glowing eyes, fearful.
Kneel and pray that as above, is not as below.
For you have entered into my death.
I am that which comes to drag, in your blood
you drown, too much to swallow.
But I am what you need, in fear.
Pain and agony, you must wallow.
Free yourself of sin, hear my howl.
Ask not who I am, for by no name need I follow.
But ask what I am, and find I am fair but foul.
I am truly a man made of monsters,
hidden beneath this cowl.
Mother Earth:
The expanse and wonder, to the love and mirth.
Brought to us, but so many lack the respect and love for her.
Her generosity endless, but our care is returned in numbers dearth.
From the sky, the mountains, plains, valleys, sands, and immense land disperse’.
From oceans, to lakes, ponds, creeks, and firth.
Our food and drink, to the very knees that hit the dirt.
To the endless reaches of space, far beyond Jupiter.
A place of infinite creation, an amazing place of berth.
That, to our mother, it gave birth.
Allowing feats of that unheard.
And she has, far beyond, proven her worth.
But we as the apex predator,
have continued to fail with repaying her.
There’s no place in this solar system, quite like Earth.
And there are no parents in this universe.
Quite like Father Sun, Mother Earth.
So we must stop our selfishness, and end this pointless nuclear purge.
We must combine our forces, create a plan to reimburse.
And do our best to save.

Project “Letters Never Meant to be Read” Hangover and Marketing Woes

I am truly proud of this project Letters Never Meant to be Read and I thank all of the letter writers for putting themselves out there to get it done. Kindle Version (still not married up yet on Amazon). I started all of this three years ago by writing a letter to someone who I felt did me wrong. What started as some kind of creative therapy turned into a full blown book with other great writers. I plan to do this twice a year until I die, and I often do what I say I will do, I am dangerous that way.
Someone, someday will take great notice at these efforts and WE will be able to point at the first volume with extreme happiness. Please, write some yourself and encourage others to write letters and send them in. The next batch are due May 1st, I dare you…
Marketing Woes: Any book has one problem to answer, who will buy it? The more we sell, the higher our rank, the more chance we have of showing up randomly in front of strangers’ faces and being recommended by Amazon which is what we need to have a chance at this project going viral. That is the name of the game in a nutshell. We need some initial momentum to garner more interest.
I remain unconvinced that there is one way, a silver bullet to market a book. If you have one, I will swallow that pill right in front of your face. I have been approached by many who want to sell packages in all price ranges who use Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, everything.
Please use whatever social media platforms you already use and get the word out. I am proud of this work because it is my baby, of course I want it to grow wings. Besides that though, it is a fun read, a glance at the life and time of the letter writer and very juicy.